YOU ARE AN INSULT TO FOOD, WRITING, AND HUMANKIND

one apartment i lived in toronto got the INFOMERCIAL CHANNEL.  you heard right.  and it was a continuous loop of mind numbing before and after pics, celebrity endorsements and kitchen demonstrations.  it was glorious and so soothing.
 

this is the next best thing, I guess.  Shout out to the woman in yellow!  one of my favourite models!  It's like ANTM but for people on anti-anxiety medication because everything is so.... slow... and.... quiet.  And ANTM is, well....
 

the main male host.... he's this.... i don't know, total fashion fag.  Like... interested in accenting a woman's true beauty and blah blah blah this is a blouse for when you don't want to show off everything be a lady be a lady BE A LADY!  

The best is when there's another fashion fag there to present something and the two of them are like.... an inch away from queening out but they know the cameras are on them and they can't be "too gay"..... and one of them said, while showing a women's collection "i would wear this with a solid colour skinny jean, and lots of jewellery..... if i was a woman."  And i picture the floor director pointing violently back to the models as if to say "we have real women here!  don't be so gay!"
 

I will never understand gay men who dedicate their lives/professions to making women look beautiful.  I don't.... it's not my thing.  I don't understand it the same way i don't understand people WANTING children n babies.  I'm not shaming it or saying it's bad.... it just bewilders me and I don't want to understand.

we need to be beautifying each other!  not somebody's hetero wives!  (uh oh spending too much time on tumblr)
 

-sweet potatoes baked in a baking dish with some mild curry seasoning
-tilapia fried in garlic, dill and coriander (too lazy to buy new spices)
-leftover quinoa
 
I am so sick of health food blogs.  They all look, sound, read the same.  Nobody's saying anything new, and they're all written by some sunkissed 20 something west coast gal with a "passion for healthy eating!"  and here to tell you that "eating healthy doesn't mean a sacrifice in taste!!!  also i have the most ADORABLE BABY GIRL, Ella, and live with my SUPER SWEET MUSICIAN BOYFRIEND!"

BITCH WHAT DECADE ARE YOU FROM.  SAY SOMETHING NEW.
YOU ARE AN INSULT TO FOOD, WRITING, AND HUMANKIND

if i read one more article about the wonders of kale i'm going to "kale" all over your dad's face cuz he's gaggin' 4 it.  (day 12 of not ejaculating.  i'm sweating sperm)

Finally made my February goal sheet.  this months food goals
-more greens!
-raw oats (soaked in almond milk)
-Eat For Deadlift Fridays! 

the last tip is in bold.... because i've learned that if i don't eat enough on the days i don't work out.... it still affects me!  Even if.... it hasn't happened in a while.... but back when I had disaster weekends and I would skip lunch n dinner on saturday, i would eat regularly on sunday but still not be up to full power on monday.  I'm sensitive!!!!
 

Pre work out deadlift friday breakfast

-2 cups oats
-1 cup sunflower seeds
-shredded coconut

cover with almond milk, leave overnight in the fridge.  in the morning it's ready to eat!  nice alternative to oatmeal if you're sick of cooking it/burning your pots. 

YOU WANNA KNOW HOW MANY CALORIES ARE IN THIS?
YOU WANNA KNOW ABOUT CALORIES BECAUSE CALORIES ARE THE END OF THE WORLD?
YOU FAGS DON'T EVEN KNOW
YOU FAGS DON'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT MY CALORIES

THIS BREAKFAST HAS....
PROBABLY... ACTUALLY EXACTLY AROUND

1800 CALORIES

AND YOU THINK ABOUT FAT
AND WEIGHT
AND FAT AND UGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGGHGH  LOVE HANDLES
WHATEVER YOU'VE READ IN COSMO 

WHAT IF I TOLD YOU 1800 BEAUTIFUL CALORIES ARE BEAUTIFUL AND NECESSARY FOR MY BRAIN AND RECOVERY AND BLOOD PURIFICATION

YOU FAGS DON'T EVEN KNOW!!!!

I miss these photo posts!  Mostly because they're prompts to write... don't need to think of subjects/topics.

Vincent:  are we fightinggggggggg?